There are a few people, including myself at times, who wonder why I have taken such an interest in the darkest of dark human traits – psychopathy. Is this merely the obsessional behaviour of someone trying in vain to regain some sense of perceived power having being well and truly screwed by someone of this pernicious persuasion? Could there also be some secondary gain to be milked by observing how many others have been similarly screwed by similarly nasty bastards – a classic case of schadenfreude palliating my psychic pain, my self-blame and shame?
Yes, I admit it – they, and I, have a point. The process of being thoroughly done-over by a psychopath inevitably leads to examining oneself, one’s motives and one’s shadow. In fact, if one is to escape the toxic effects of being ‘gaslighted’ – made to feel guilty and responsible for the evil acts imparted on one – then becoming one’s own psychoanalyst is a necessary step to healing. This is because a psychopath will make you feel you are the crazy one – and it takes time for you to convince yourself he hasn’t got a point.
This tactic, however, didn’t really work on me.
“You’re a strange man, you know” – he informed me in a rare moment of honesty.
This felt, oddly, rather nice. In fact, in my 65th year on this planet, I took it as a compliment. I rather like strange, crazy people. The statement made me smile then, as it still does today.
On reflection, it was a kind of ‘funny by gaslight’ statement… (sorry)
And so I have discovered once the psychopath’s hand is revealed, and you can remove yourself from its evil grasp, they can become quite fascinating. And because, along with other signs of humanity and humility, they lack a sense of humour about themselves – they effectively clear the way for others to laugh at them. Think Blackadder,or any Ric Mayall character.
And whilst in no way making light of their appalling crimes to humanity, an Adolf Hitler can instantly transform into a Charlie Chaplin, and a Kim Jong Un becomes ….well remains… a Kim Jong Un.
Their self importance, their facade, their creepy smile, their obvious lies believed by themselves only, their doting clapping goose-stepping sycophants, their jumbled word salad – all become the stuff of great satire and great comedy. Bring back Spitting Image.
And so when a certain face from our past appears on our television without invitation or warning – as happens to us on a regular basis – we have worked through a number of responses. First, there were the involuntary panic attacks as memories of past traumas were triggered, next were the angry responses including a chorus of four- letter-word rhyming slang, and then the painting of a black moustache under his nose on the TV screen (a short-lived, and in retrospect I admit, a poorly planned venture.)
And now?
Well, when we can’t reach for the remote in time – there are shrieks of laughter amidst …well the shrieks.
And what’s more, now as a fully fledged member of Dad’s Army (I received my Gold Card in the post yesterday), I can be heard singing at the top of my voice:
“Who do you think you are kidding Mister H.., if you think we’re on the run…?”
For more visit: Goodbye Psychopaths. Robin Kelly on YouTube. And Subscribe.
robinkellyblog 